


About understanding

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-20
Updated: 2014-12-20
Packaged: 2018-03-02 12:04:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2811317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Takes place after 8th season finale. Dean is slowly losing his mind and no one seems to understand him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	About understanding

**Author's Note:**

> This was mostly me dealing with the heart break the season finale caused me, so it might be slightly confusing.

Sam claims he's okay and that Dean can't do anything more for him. He explains how Dean has already done too much for him and Sam couldn't possibly ask for anything more. Then he notes that Dean is probably tired and should go to bed and just relax for a while. He doesn't understand.

Kevin tells he needs to be alone to read the angel tablet, so they could fix everything. He insists that Dean doesn't go buy him anything. That he has enough food and drinks for a while. Then he comments on Deans tired eyes and how maybe it would be better for him to just sleep it all off. He doesn't understand.

He calls Charlie and asks if she needs help with anything. Maybe she needs to talk about her mother or maybe she can tell about some hot girl she slept with. Charlie just answers that everything's alright with her and then adds that maybe Dean should get some sleep. She doesn't understand.

He goes for a run, but his thoughts are too loud and haunting. He goes to a bar, but can't get anything down his throat. He reads a book, but his ears are ringing and he can't breathe properly. He feels sick and suddenly he finds himself banging his head to a wall. He doesn't understand.

And that is where he gives up.

Sam is shouting at him and Kevin is desperately trying to clean after him. The whole bunker is turned upside down, but he doesn't find anything. He punches his hand through a window and leaves it bleeding even though Sam and Kevin are both trying to get him to tie it up. It feels good and keeps him grounded. He screams and yells words that Sam an Kevin might or might not understand, but he doesn't know how to explain. All he knows is that there must be something. Anything.

It might have taken seconds, minutes or hours, he doesn't know, but finally Sam gets what he's saying. He takes a step towards Dean and softly lays his hand to Deans bicep. He forgets to thank before he's out of the door, but Sam doesn't mind. Maybe he does understand a bit.

She has a client, but when she hears the terror in Deans voice, she sents the client away. She lays her hand on his scarred bicep and the lights flicker. A dot appears on the map and again, he forgets to thank before he's out of the door, hand still bleeding. He hopes she doesn't understand.

It isn't far away and Deans hands are shaking when he pulls the car to a forest road. He gets out of the car right after he sees the dark figure staring at the sky and runs rest of the way. He stops few steps away from the figure, a man in a trenchcoat and opens his mouth. He's not surprised when nothing comes out, but he tries again.  
''Come home Castiel'', he finally breathes out and Castiel turns around.

''My fault... It's all my fault'' Castiel breathes out and Dean realizes that they are both crying silently.  
''C'mere Cas'' he whispers and Cas closes the space between them in a few shivering steps and collapses into a tight hug. After that Dean mutters something to his ear that could be 'sorry' or 'it's okay' or maybe even 'i love you', but the tears turn the words incomprehensible. Slowly Cas starts to tie a strip of his ripped coat around Deans bleeding hand and he knows everything's okay.

And Castiel understands.


End file.
